Dearest Family and Friends
57 Cumberland Street, San Francisco CA 94110
Phone +1 415 738 2112
Nadine 415 595 0023
Colman 415 871 9920
Skype: nadinemellor
October Highlights
Babymoon
BabymoonOur first two weeks with Esme seemed to pass in a dream. Not because we suffered from lack of sleep so much, but more from the daze of our new situation, getting to grips with feeding, changing and sleeping patterns, feeling sore, and the luxury of having Mum here cooking, cleaning and shopping for us –
and wonderful sunny warm weather to boot! We had time to deal with the email frenzy, take pictures, receive visitors, and marvel at our gorgeous girl. We were also quite overwhelmed at all the good wishes and love that flowed our way – 
THANK YOU so much for your gifts, texts, emails, phone calls, flowers – they do mean a great deal especially when we are so far distant. Colman wasn’t able to take any paternity leave as it was manic at work at this time, but at least he was able to work from home during the first two weeks, which made life for us all less stressful. We are truly blessed with our daughter. She is wonderfully healthy,
growing fit to beat the band – her birth weight of 7lb6oz was surpassed in 5 days; at 2 week check up she was 8lb6oz and had grown an inch and her head measured 36cm. Our paediatrician told me that if only we could bottle and sell my breast milk we’d make fortune as it was obviously 
so nutritious and beneficial (to which my response was a girlish, oh thank you, you say the nicest things! Colman’s retort was he probably says that to all the new mothers). 
In addition we do feel she is the most 
beautiful baby we’ve ever seen – while recognising that hormones and parental pride render us quite unbiased. Her blue eyes are enormous, her upper lashes are long and curled, and it has been charming watching her develop from unfocused and unblinking to getting more and more alert, eyes widening if possible, slowly beginning to track objects across the room. We have hung a cute mobile over her changing table, which she is now aware of. 
She gets a massage every other day which she seems to like and is when she most resembles a Little Frog - one of her many affectionate nicknames - Baldy being another as her hair steadily fell out through the month.
She’s a good trencherwoman as befits the genes inherited from the mother’s side of the family. Breastfeeding has been good from the get go – one breast did get a blocked duct briefly but it soon alleviated with massage and hot showers. She is occasionally phased by strong milk flow which causes her to fall off the breast wailing with her upper arm flailing, but overall feeding is going very well. 
And most crucially, she has been sleeping well – we have made a nest out of sheepskins beside our bed on the floor – 
after feeding at night she is swaddled and put to sleep in the nest and invariably goes to sleep right away. Night time feedings take a good hour or so but after she’s replete, again she falls asleep quickly. So our strategy is to get to bed early and then we manage 6-8 hours every night. And this has been happening from the start so we haven’t been underslept really – a fabulous start to our family life.
Her first few weeks were very 
calm and tranquil – her default positions seemed to be sleeping, feeding, watching with big eyes – 
unbothered by comings and goings, a parade of people holding her, or being parcelled up like a burrito, being taken out and about, in the Baby Bjorn (thank you Nicola), or in the stroller (thank you Pat and Niamh). 
Our apartment is light and serene and that has perhaps contributed to her easygoing temperament. We were also pretty well organised which helped. Of course it is pure luck as to what kind of baby you get and although our first few weeks have been relatively straightforward and unstressed, we fully anticipate terrible 2s, tumultuous affairs, tantrums and tattoos as recompense.Top
Visitors
We had a steady flow of visitors eager to make her acquaintance in the first fortnight. 
Most notable was Uncle Patrick, in town from Pittsburgh, able to join us twice, who gave her a Pittsburgh Steelers bib, which caused Esme some confusion as she thought she was supporting the Gunners. 
Other visitors included Armani, Geoff and their baby Marcus 
destined to be one of Esme’s first suitors – as you can see fatherhood has not diminished the steady flow of alcohol – Meredith and Nate, Laura, Patrick and Catherine and Caroline. Amazingly all expressed admiration at her bonny features – how kind of them to chime in with our thinking!
Esme’s First DLGAt precisely one week old – how very appropriate Esme was born on a Thursday –
we went to the Drinking Ladies Group kindly hosted by Debra and Gil who had just returned from six months travelling around Europe and Japan. Esme was perfectly behaved all night, mostly asleep or feeding. She easily adopted the ideal drunken pose and was accepted immediately as a member of the tribe. Esme’s First Full Weekend
On the Saturday among other visitors, we were delightfully surprised by a flying visit from Junior, who works for BA, an old friend of both Colman and mine from way back – last seen in Barcelona. 
That afternoon all of us plus Amy went up to Twin Peaks – glorious day and not a cloud in the sky - to see the annual Fleet Week celebrations which included a fly past over all the Bay by the renowned Blue Angels, the US equivalent to the Red Arrows. Although windy and incredibly noisy when the jets screamed overhead at the top of the hill, Esme didn’t turn a hair.
On Sunday 
Laurel and John came over for brunch and two bottles of fine champagne were consumed between 3. 
Drunkenly we then took out the stroller for its first outing to the Castro Street Fair meeting up with Jason and Jim. Colman paid $5 for me to be kissed by an Adonis of my choice at the kissing booth. 
Much excited I chose the tallest and blondest of the wares on offer and to my disgust received only a chaste peck on the cheek. You’re the wrong sex I was informed. “Hmph, $5 is $5”, was my thinking… We traversed the thronging streets with every gay subtribe on parade and checked out the stalls – yes crystals, artwork, community activism, wacky games, T-shirts, accessories, kebabs, the usual fare all in evidence. That night Rob dropped by to meet Esme.Top
Restaurant of the Month
On Mum’s last night we took her to dinner at Limon, serving Nuevo Latino Peruvian fare. The menu specialises in ceviches, which we tried for first course – fresh seafood marinated in piquant spices – and in exotic sculpting of red snapper with corn, rice and salsa (my choice) and delicate seafood stews served up with Peruvian Adresso cream sauces. Desserts were immaculately presented – ours had swirls of sauces surrounding ice cream.
Mum left on the 10th October after Kim had taken our photos in the garden to commemorate the three generations. We both cried on the doorstep as she had been so helpful and we don’t know when she’ll be able to see Esme again. We have been lucky in seeing so much of each other this year but it may be another 5-6 months before she can come back to San Francisco. Hopefully in the spring. In the meantime we will keep in touch via webcam. Paternity Leave
Colman eventually got to take 4 days paternity after Mum left. We had a lovely time together, not doing very much, taking it easy, having lie-ins, resting up – my recovery period was going well but included herbal baths, medication and herbs, plus an iron-rich diet as I had lost lots of blood. Its hard to track down liver in this city but we managed! 
We also caught up with Reise, our doula. Colman had a night out seeing the new Philip Glass opera; I went to Litquake with Adam and Jen, an annual literary event which features poetry and prose readings in various establishments down Valencia. Jecca and Rob and their boys came over for Sunday lunch which was really good fun. We went to Dolores Park afterwards, admired the Extreme Hula Hoopers, scoffed ice lollies and avoided near death on scooters.
The next day I decided it would be a good idea to have my hair cut while Colman could look after Esme. So having expressed a bottle of milk I cheerfully set off into town. Colman called me to say that as the bottle hadn’t been sterilised we would have to get Esme to me as quickly as possible after the haircut. So a comedy of desperate haircutting and styling then ensued with regular text updates as to whether she was sleeping or not. Colman ventured forth to find a taxi; uncharacteristically it took ages to get one, Esme bellowing all the while. 
Eventually they drew up outside the hairdressing school, baby hysterical. I bundled in and whipped out the boob straightaway, and kept her on the breast until we reached SFMOMA, carried on in the café, while Colman, shellshocked, wandered around the art works. We joined him in the Olafur Eliasson exhibition, Esme even went into the ice car installation wrapped in a blanket. First Golden Gate Bridge Crossing
On Colman’s last day of paternity leave, we hired a Zipcar and went over the bridge to Marin. We looked at the bridge, breastfed by the side of the road, and drove to Sausalito for a lovely Italian lunch at Poggio. 
Esme slept in the car seat quietly at the table throughout and we were able to have a romantic meal starting with champagne and ending with my new inspired breastfeeding method – the table top – which saves your back and means you’re fully engaged with your dining companion across the table. Bird of the Month
After lunch we drove around Marin Headlands and were excited to see the uncommon Northern Harrier (Circus Cyaneus). Its distinctive white rump and slender long wings provided positive identification. It was soaring with some Turkey Vultures showing a contrast in shape and behaviour. Top
Visitor of the Month
Zoe
Esme was three weeks old when one of our closest friends from London, Zoe, came to stay for the weekend – FANTASTIC to see her and we were really thrilled to introduce her to Esme. We collected her on Saturday morning and drove straight to Rob and Jecca’s to watch England lose the Rugby World Cup Final - Esme’s first big sporting occasion. Good to prepare early for a lifetime of England losing at sport.
Then home for a party - billed as tea, cakes and early evening drinks – which started at 5 to celebrate our first year of being in San Francisco, 
Esme’s arrival and Zoe’s visit. As befits new members of the Parenthood Club the place was initially overrun with babies and children – Caroline and Ava resuming their lovefest which had begun at our Baby Shower. Esme, for the first time really, got a bit overexcited with so many people in the early evening and needed to take half an hour time out to calm down before 
rejoining the throng.Being close to Halloween various guests arrived in costume – Adam and Jen
topped the lot by arriving last as Babe-raham Lincoln and a Purple Devil, but honourable mentions also go to Akhil and Amy as the Dirty Leprechaun and Lucky Star. 
It was also Lights Out that evening at 8pm – a conservation event that encourages people to turn off all non-essential lights for an hour – 
so we turned out our lights and had candles illuminating the apartment. Everybody agreed it added to the ambiance most favourably. Gerardo brought us a bottle of best DonQ rum, which was imbibed late in the evening, primarily (quelle surprise) by the DLG and their cohorts.
The sharing out and wearing of our wig collection also provoked much merriment. Gil looked most fetching – 
a veritable dead ringer for Barbra – while Colman had an uncanny look of Kurt Cobain. The party wound up at 1115, which we thought 
not bad at all considering!The next day we had another surprise flying visit from Junior, back in San Francisco, and he joined the four of us on an outing to Marin. It was a supremely gorgeous day – not a cloud in the sky – and the best showcase for the charms of the Bay area one could imagine.
The bridge looked stunning – deep rust red against the shimming vivid blue bay. We drove around Marin Headlands and walked down to Point Bonita lighthouse, 
Colman carrying Esme all the way there and back as we had forgotten the Baby Bjorn. Zoe treated us to dinner that night, Esme wondrously slept all the way through the meal at Cha Ya on Valencia.
On Zoe’s final day we strolled around the Mission district, checking out the neighbourhood, the Park, the murals including Balmy Alley and the Women’s Building, chatting about life, loves, past times, new projects, hopes and fears.
Sooo lovely to see her and it was no wonder I cried saying goodbye that afternoon – and I felt blue all week – Colman back at work, Zoe gone and much on the domestic front to contend with! Blues were banished by getting out and about, often with Armani and baby Marcus, and keeping busy.Top
First Night Out
Expressing milk has been a doddle. However, we have had next to no success in getting her to take a bottle of expressed milk. First discovered on my night out watching a performance of hula dancing with the DLG; had left Colman with expressed milk (in sterilised bottle this time). She screamed for an hour before sleeping and eventually only taking the bottle under protest. Colman was totally frazzled by the time I got home. She is demonstrating a stubborn streak and defiantly knows breast is best! Since then, we have tried different bottle shapes and teats to no avail, and will persevere as although not crucial at this point, it would be good to have a night out without Esme once in a while either with or without Colman…Seasonal Event of the Month
Halloween was marked as usual by Jack O Lantern pumpkins on every second house, costumes on parade at any opportunity. On the Saturday before we went to dinner with Gerardo, Sophia and Jason, who were dressed to the nines as Peter Pan, Wendy and the White Rabbit – Colman sported his wedding shirt and Guatemalan jacket, while I had my 70s disco shirt on but we both felt rather underdressed.
The night before Halloween Esme experienced her first earthquake, although seemed completely oblivious. With a magnitude of 5.6 on the Richter scale, it felt at first as if a big lorry rumbled past except this went on and on - for at least 25 seconds - and the whole house shook considerably. Although quite big, there were no reports of damage - apart from a jar of jam which fell off a shop shelf in San Jose in the South Bay! Apparently there were 40 aftershocks although we didn't notice them. On Halloween itself we went with Kristan and Steve (whose baby, Soren, is another beau of Esme's - if they would only notice each other that is) to Fair Oaks Street nearby in Noe Valley, which celebrates the event in a very over the top manner – every house festooned with bats, spiders, witches, cobwebs; every garage turned into a spooky dungeon with floating ghouls; every child wearing a batman, spiderman, or ghost outfit. 
Mural of the MonthThis picture of Zoe was taken beside Balmy Alley in the heart of the Mission.
Stencil of the Month
Come and visit!
Love and hugs
Nadine and Colman xxx
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